Family Discipleship
Families really matter. They are the basic building block of society. Some families are blocks of strength. Others are fragile and weak. What does the Bible say constitutes a family well built? I’m reading through a book entitled Family Discipleship: Leading Your Home Through Time, Moments & Milestones by Matt Chandler & Adam Griffin. The authors argue that a well built family is rooted in discipleship. This is a very important book. And it’s not just for parents. If you are single, it’ll equip you to prepare for your own future family should the Lord so lead. Or if you should be single for the rest of your life, it’ll equip you to encourage parents in family discipleship.
What is family discipleship? The authors dispel the misguided notion of adding more things to do. It has less to do with the extraordinary and much more with the quite ordinary. Parents can live out their powerful position of influence over a child in the regular rhythms of family life. This requires a plan, which the authors propose: modeling, time, moments and milestones. Let’s briefly look at these.
First, family discipleship requires parents to consider the important aspect of modeling. Do parents serve as a godly example for the family? Is there a genuine walk with Jesus? Is there a demonstration of a life of worship and repentance? It’s important to start with the parents since they are called to influence their children in the Lord (Eph. 6:4).
Second, family discipleship calls for the intentional use of time. Notice how this is not the urgency of trying to find more time. How stressful when time seems so fleeting! But it is the consideration of using existing time better. This is the point of leveraging time to think, discuss and live out the gospel.
Third, family discipleship is to capture moments. Moments are a specific use of time that revolves around the purpose of gospel-centered conversations. Families talk about all ranges of subjects. And often a conversation touches a subject only to stay there. How beneficial it is when conversations, regardless of subject, find their way to gospel ruminations. This can happen all the time when being intentional. For example, my kids are in the Harry Potter phase. How often I have turned the conversation to gospel themes! We can use any subject as a springboard into Scripture.
Fourth, family discipleship uses milestones. A milestone is a significant step of God’s work in the life of the family and child. It is a time of celebration and remembrance of God’s grace. A birthday is a significant time. We remember our past parties and growth. How much more our spiritual growth. Disciples of Jesus slowly but surely grow. How good it is to create and remember spiritual milestones!
This framework is helpful for family discipleship. In addition to the material concern that parents have for their children we must not forget the spiritual. We must not forget the call of the Lord for parents to raise their children as disciples of Jesus. Listen to the words of the authors:
“Clothe your children? Yes, of course, every day, but also help them put on the full armor of God so that they may be able to stand against the devil’s schemes (Eph. 6:10–18). Feed your kids? Yes, of course, every day, but also give them Jesus, the daily bread of life, so they will not hunger or thirst for eternity (John 6:35). Give them a safe place to live? Yes, of course, every day, but teach them to dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of their lives that they may inquire of God and delight in his beauty (Ps. 27:4). Get them an education? Yes, of course, but teach them to discern good from evil and right from wrong, otherwise they will choose what seems right and it will lead them to death (Isa. 5:20; Prov. 14:12). If your children are successful and they get everything they ever want, what good is it if in the process they forfeit their eternal soul (Mark 8:36)? We want you to have no greater joy in your child’s life, nothing that even comes close, than that they are walking in the truth (3 John 4). [Chandler, Matt. Family Discipleship (p. 35). Crossway.]”
Families really matter. And families rooted in discipleship will grow in strength not only for this life but also for the life to come. Amen.